I have no disability (yet) and no medical coverage. My medicine bill is over $300. My service dog needs dental care. But I have a home and we are warm and fed. I don't know where the money will come from, I just keep praying for disability. I have been reduced to begging the government to let me live below poverty in hopes of surviving. This is now what I wanted to do with ,my life. I wanted to be someone. I still do but I know that's a pipe dream. 
This past summer Pfizer had computer glitches (so they say) and kept deleting me and others) off their patient assistance program. They sent a letter apologizing for any inconvenience. Inconvenience?! You freaking blew up my life. The pain was crazy bad. My brain was so flooded I couldn't think straight.  I have bounced 2 checks, ran out of food stamps, forgot to feed and water my service dog, slept all day, forgot to turn off stove burner, locked myself out at 1am cried at anything, was a worse klutz than usual and who knows what all else.
The pain was immense and I became erratic. My life fell apart. I don;t know how long it will take before I get back on the rails again, if I can before another glitch happens.  Before my meds don't get to me (two weeks of that while no Lyrica and I was really bad sick) . Before the weather changes (believe it or now I am really effected by weather change, the faster the worse I feel). Before I cantch something (low resistance) before I have problems because I cant afford my OTCs (Over The Counter) or God know what and I fall apart again. 

https://bit.ly/2OBViqX

Eye Surgery

When I moved from Georgia to Kansas the help I could get changed. I have sliding scale dental and vision now. The eye check up for new glasses changed things. I needed to see a specialist. The fluid between my corena and iris should be able to move to the inside of my eye. My eyes don't have just just small tunnels but the specialist cant even see the opening. It's totally closed. The iris has grown so much it covers theopenings. I have lazer eye surgery tomorrow on my right eye and next week  the left. They will  make a hole in each of my irises. Not gonna lie, Im not thrilled. My eyes and the color of my irsis are amazing. Now I will have a hole in each eye. But at least the sharp eye pain should go away. Also I thank God I got the money for surgery. 

Believe or disbelieve?

It's dangerous when your doctor doesn't believe you.
It's difficult when friends don't believe you.
It really sucks when family doesn't believe.

I hate that I often can't see. It's like someone smeared Vaseline over them. 

Day 3 of OH MY GOD IT FEELS LIKE SOMEONE IS WHIPPING THE SKIN OFF MY BACK.

The nerve endings feel raw and damaged.  

And it's not fun.

No, it can't be shingles, I've never had chicken pox.

Before today Mom hadn't seen anything wrong with my back, but today she was putting cream on my back and said, "It just looks like mumps".  

Me:  O.O Mumps?!

Well, when I was a kid the doctor said I had the strain of mumps that would stay in my body forever and flare up any time  and mom said mumps can happen anywhere so yea *sarcasm* *insert unhappy face here*

After the creepy-crawlies feeling(feeling spiders or bugs where there is nothing), the actual ant bites (stepped into ants getting out of the car in town and had bites before I could get out of them) and wanting to claw my foot off (dang those bites hurt!), my back started burning last night. It felt like I was being whipped. But mom didn't see anything. Hello fibro nerves flare. I would rather have the creepy-crawlies nerve flare. =P